National Volunteer Week: Move outside of yourself

When you are a child, maybe a young child, maybe it lasts till you are a teenager - you believe the world consists of just you.

Then at some point you realise it doesn't.

I don't know exactly where the life example for volunteering came from - my parents were very busy people - they didn't actually go out and volunteer.

But they did make time for others. There was always time to entertain someone who dropped in. There was always time for a long-winded phone call with a family friend. Our guest room was open to people who needed it - in fact that's why we had a guest room in the first place instead of all the other things it could have been.

My parents taught me that my family consisted of more than just my relatives - we all tend to adopt people and then we all tend to mother them to death, much to their annoyance.

We never cottoned on to this until much, much later, when years after I had flown the nest and despite my mother's attempts to get me to return home on a permanent basis, I insisted on still flying... that's when we realised I was struggling with bouts of depression.

And that maybe due to our culture a lot of Sri Lankan women suffer it too, not knowing it for what it is and that maybe my mother has it too.

My mother's instinctual reaction was to convince me to come home - with the first occurrence I did. And then I flew again. And it, eventually, happened again.

But I didn't go home. Instead I was on the line with my mother who then said "You need to stop thinking about yourself so much."

"What do you mean?"

"Go out and do something - for other people - it will take you out of yourself."

And I realised that one of the things I was missing was a sense of community and connection. Doing something for others. It was part of my upbringing but life as a US university student and as an Australian one was so structured that outreach, connection, community didn't seem part of it at all. Didn't even seem viable.

So I volunteered. I volunteered at a charity shop and that's where I learnt I need to volunteer somewhere where people like me.

I tried to organise and run a volunteer support group at university which was when I learnt that a) people expect you to do their thinking for them and b) you can't create a mini-community within a system that does not itself create a sense of community especially among the students.

I then volunteered for Oaktree. I don't know if anyone here has done so but when I did, there was not much of a system and fair enough it was a work in progress but people were flogging dead horses in terms of what they tried to do. Nobody seemed to know what their roles were or who to report to. Hopefully, it has become better. So from that I learnt that these things have to be organised reasonably well so that everyone can function and do their job and that you have to volunteer for a place that respects you and your contribution.

Then I very nervously jumped into three different things. Three different things that required three different skills - all of which, I was reasonably good at.

1) Leadership and technology
2) Editing & my general knowledge
3) Writing and a love of music and a work ethic

I can lead - I know that. But I don't like doing it because I don't like it when people don't think for themselves. But I put my hand up to be on the Society of Editors WA committee because I knew they needed people. And they really needed me to run technological interference and to be a buffer of sorts for the membership. When things get ugly in the mailing list over whether "Shan't" should have one apostrophe or two (you could make the case for either but general acceptance is that it is one) and so on, that's when I have had to step in and calm people down. And let's not talk about the state the website was in when I joined.

I am an editor and I know quite a lot because I read. Voraciously. Anything. And I remember it. Seriously, you need someone for your pub quiz night? I am your girl. I was on the GK team in school - we won championships. So then suddenly somehow I found myself editing policy documents for the Centre for Policy Development. I get to edit government documents, I get to scold the analysts when they get their facts wrong... and they actually love me for it. And it's all voluntary.

I also just realised that I have a lot of power indirectly over what gets done in this country ... so you lot better be nice to me! ;-D :-P

I love music. I used to dance a lot - still do. I needed clips for my portfolio when I first started writing so I wrote music reviews for RTR FM and then I saw the volunteer position and joined up. Now quite a few arts people still associate me with the station - I volunteered for over a year, working at the front desk, organising the CD archive and being the bouncer at the events.

Yes I was a bouncer (they don't call it that, they call it "working at the door"). These are hipsters and indie people we are talking about here - I must be quite scary in a leather jacket - petite little me - because they all line up nicely and hold out their arms to show me their wristbands so I can let them in as soon as I come into view or raise my eyebrows.

I don't even like half the music they play and most of the people associated with the station are bit goggle-eyed at that. I volunteered because I like what the station's goal is and I want to support it - there's really nothing in it for me.

I still suffer bouts of depression but not as frequently and not as badly as I used to. Nowadays I don't volunteer much - wait that's a lie.

I am voluntary convenor of the 2013 IPEd Conference (which is a very very scary thing to put your hand up for) and I am on occasion still doing voluntary editing work for the CPD.

The point is that now I know where my life is going. I have work where I get paid to do something for the community - ie. inform them about science. I have a book that I am writing that I feel will help a lot of people. I have these little things I do on the side where someone (*cough* Janine Ripper, *cough*) challenges me to write something that hopefully helps other people. Or where someone else (*cough* Alicia Curtis, *cough*) says "Why don't you run a how to write a book group?"

And I also know that life gets out of sorts for me when I focus too much on myself or too little on myself. Volunteering is part of what maintains the balance and if I do too much, I overstretch myself.

I don't know about you. I don't know how you were brought up so I am not about to say "This is what you should do." But I think you should consider volunteering an option.

You learn a lot about yourself and I think that's always a good thing.